Effervescent Life!
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
Here is the short story I posted HERE:
Reality TV
The predestination of my my mind is an often visited one to that day. The day that shall never die. Oh, how I loathe it! Where is big pink eraser for our brains? I do not want to be on this train of thought. That day remains the playground of my life. Like a child I am at the helm of every action. Sometimes I play the same still image in my mind repeatedly, and other times I bend reality so that I may pretend I have made some progress moving on.Jenny was my best friend. She kept her black hair short, but wild. Her eyes were large and grey, and so soothing you could have called them hypnotic. That girl was full of life, and life mostly loved her back. Every person I know, was drawn to the radience of her being, the gleeful cheer in her face, and the openness of her heart. I will thank the heavens every day that she was my friend.Unfortunately Jenny had a dark side. Every now and again a deep depression would grab ahold of her. She would question herself, denigrate herself, and become violent towards herself. I was one of very few people who knew of this, and often I was her sounding board. I tried to get her to visit a psychiatrist, but she refused, believing in her own competence to cure herself. Over time, it was obvious to me that she needed real help, and I decided to have a serious chat with her.That day we went to lunch. We talked about graduating college soon over our lemon swordfish. I was pensively awaiting the right moment to approach her, but it did not come during our last meal together. Instead we were strolling through the park when I brought it up. She did not react well."What the Fuck Amy! You know it isn't that bad." Her eyes were starting to get a molten glow of anger."Jenny, I just--" I tried to interject."You fucking bitch! You think I'm crazy! YOU are the crazy one! Bitch!" she raged at me. Then she stormed off.I stopped and watched her go. I could tell she was crying by the time she left the concrete path. I was hoping a little distance would calm her down. Deep in thought I wondered if I should approach her parents. Yes, I remember thinking that was a good idea. I decided to head back to her place, and I stopped for a soda along the way. I bought her one too. I looked at my watch. A half hour had gone by, and I hoped she was no longer angry.I climbed up the steps to her apartment, and knocked on her door. No answer. The second time I pounded a little harder and the door clicked and swung open. It was silent. Still. I looked around slowly wondering where she was. My heart started to pound and I walked into the entry. "Jen." I called out. Nothing. I started to jog toward her room panicked."Jenny! Jen?" "JENNY!" I flung open her bedroom door. Empty, but a sliver of light shone out from her bathroom. I grasped the knob and pushed the door inward."No, God, no" From here on out things become more real than anything I have ever experienced. A tub full of water, and my best friend floating in a sea of red. Blood. Wielding her galvanized razor as if it was a sword. "No, no. no. no. no . no." Those beautiful eyes staring at me, but never more to see me. Her clothes floating aimlessly on the surface, and her hair also on display. Life splattered on her clean white bathroom tile. I fainted.That day is everyday for me. My psychiatrist tells me to turn the channel, but I cannot yet. I am still Jenny's best friend.. She was able to break our bond, but I am unwilling yet. Someday, but not today..................
It still need a lot of character development, but at least I wrote something. It's been months!
Written at 9:48 PM by ©Jac.
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