To the new blog!

Effervescent Life

Blasphemy right?

The Bible was written for man. So is "I am the Alpha and the Omega" specific only to mankind? What about "Godkind"?

Humans by nature are born to navigate life, but what if "Gods" are "born" to create life ?

What if our God is just an Earth geek like some of us and our spouses are Runescape, WoW, and the SIMS geeks?

What if God's purpose in God "life" was to select a planet and experiment, develop, and oversee, it? It would kind of explain the obsessiveness in the Old Testament, and the break from that rigidity in the New testament wouldn't it?

Like maybe His "God parents" made him self censor due to all the violence and smoting, and eventually made Him get off his God couch and play outside. Encouraging him to make Earth as self sustaining as possible.

And you just know He's THE MAN in his peer group because look at the other planets in our solar system.

Dear Car Commercial,

I'm sure you thought that having a thin woman strip in elevator, revealing work-out clothes, to the tune of "Turn Me On" would be a big hit, but I know something you may find informative:

Woman know how to remove clothing, in the passengers seat of a car, while belted in. It's easy!

Considering, in the commercial they were driving from an urban area into the desert, I'm sure she would have had plenty of time to undress in the car - Giving you more time to show off the car.

You are welcome.

--Jac


Dear Craigslist Pet Posters,

I understand that when you first adopted your pet you may have done stuff like spay/nueter, did yearly check-ups and maintenance, bought supplies, and (gasp) food over the months or years you have had it, but the adoption fees many of you are asking for are ridiculous.

All those things that I just mentioned? Are things you do as a good pet owner. Don't act like I should be impressed by your dogs quality of life when it was nothing more than you should have been doing in the first place.

So unless your dog shits golden eggs, a fee similar to the local humane society is far more appropriate.

Don't even get me started on you people getting rid of purebred pets. In 4 years your dog wouldn't even watch the Westminster Dog Show, much less been able to participate. Get over it. After the puppy and mold able stages, unless your dog is shown regularly, papers and purity mean squat.

Lest you think I'm some bitter person in the market for an animal, I am not. I am a bitter person who likes looking at the adorable faces!

--Jac

Dear Kids,

Please sleep past 5:30am. Mommy is not a morning person. She is a night owl. It would be nice if you would both get that magic 12 hour mark the average child sleeps at your ages. It would make us all feel better in the morning!

Kisses,
Mommy