Nah, just kidding Heathen children. I will still let you watch, but I have got to vent about the crap you watch! ~*~disclaimer that my kids get to watch only 1-2 hours in the morning, depending on what else is going on that day. Oh, and occasionally 4pm-5pm because that is their "witching hour", and if I've had it with them, on comes the TV.~*~

Clifford The Big Red Dog: No, having a dog that big is not neat. Not even a little bit. What do you do with all the dog shit? Can't use it for fertilizer since Clifford is most likely carnivorous, ya know. Dog drool? GAG! No effing way. That is just sick, SICK! I might be an animal lover, but you better believe I'd be throwing his fat ass over the humane society fence.

Big, Big World: WTF? The lead character (Snook) is fucking creepy. He's like the drunk perverted uncle you don't leave around your kids. Seriously. And you know what? Snook is the biggest character on the show, but he's supposed to be a sloth? Sloths are NOT 6 feet tall. Ick, the fish, is super annoying, and his name implies that fish are icky. Wonderful. Just another thing my kids wont eat! The anteater, Bob, who doesn't eat ants, but rather wants to be their friend? For the love of goodness sake! We wouldn't want to teach our kids anything useful would we? Gosh forbid our kids find out that anteaters eat (GASP) ants.

Barney: The Barney Ban was lifted in our house when HD took an interest in the singing and dancing promos at the begining of Wiggles DVD's. Honestly? I don't hate him as much as I used too. In fact, my one secret Barney hate is that I can't do the Mr. Knickerbocker song and dance, and yet me nearly 2yo and 4yo can. Curse you Barney for not letting me forget that I will never have rythm.

Calliou: This is a much hated program of mothers everywhere. I don't actually mind it, except the parents are far more patient that any parent who has ever crossed my path. Including myself. Apparently in cartoon land nobody has a bad day. Fuck them.

Jay-Jay The Jet Plane: This gets my vote as dumbest show. Horrible graphics, horrible voices. Brenda Blue has gone anorexic and cheesy(ier). My kids have yet to learn a single thing from this show. Not that they need to learn anything, but good heck they sponge up everything from the other shows they get to watch. You would think something from Jay-Jay would stick.

Dragon Tales: I actually don't hate this one at all. Go figure.

"I wish, I wish with all my heart, to fly with dragons in the land of heart (or a word that rhymes with heart. I cant tell...lol)!"

Not looking forward to tomorrow morning. Somebody remind me to mention music to the kids bright and early, k?

Oh, and what kids show do you MISS the most? Whether from when you were a kid or a babysitter? I miss The Big Comfy Couch.